Life is a competition, but it’s not a race against anyone else. Instead, the real journey is only against yourself and unrealised potential. It might even help you keep the important people in your life and find inspiration on your way. So let’s discuss how to make the competitive feeling to benefit your relationships and well-being.

Focus on Who You Want to Become and Let That Motivate You

The point of having a competition is to sort out who is the best in a particular field. Here’s the thing: You want to be the best version of yourself every day. By facing your life today, you’re competing with your previous performances in the past.

Still, you might have an ideal version of yourself that you’ve been thinking about, which is the person that you want to become in the future. You’re still not that person, so there is always room for improvement without blame, shame, criticism, and judgment. Start working on it by taking ownership of your feelings, thoughts, actions, and inaction.

Know When to Choose Your Battles

You never have to prove your worth against someone else. You already did your best to work to achieve what you are now. Entering a one-sided battle will waste your time.

Other people don’t want unsolicited actions and favours. Setting expectations is as important as keeping promises. You don’t want to end up giving everything for nothing.

You Have to Know When to Forfeit the Competition

There are instances when winning doesn’t take you to the best version of yourself. It’s ok to lose sometimes, and you need to accept it. Being aware of the line between determination and desperation is necessary, especially in relationships. You might be desperate for a price that will ruin your connection with the most important people in your life. So knowing when two quit is necessary when building good relationships.

You Don’t Have to Force Relationships

There is an adage that says “what is right will never have to be forced.” if you have to force anything — a friendship, a drawer shut or a relationship –, you better think twice. It can hinder you from being yourself. You shouldn’t have to force someone to choose you.

The other person should choose you — every single time. There should be no ” It’s me or the other person” ultimatums. The competition would have never started; you would be the only choice. Relationships don’t need blame, shame, criticism, and judgment. 

The Turtle Always Wins the Race

It’s completely normal to see your peers succeed sooner than you. A good reason for this instance is that we are all unique in our way. You put your energy into a specific task, so you excel in a particular field that is entirely different from them. You have a personal set of strengths and weaknesses, and so are your friends.

You might feel ungrateful for your current state as of now. My tip for you is don’t let this feeling stay for a long time. Keep in mind that you are always ahead of people who haven’t started yet to achieve what you are in now. The slow and consistent grind you put forth each day builds up and will even turn your life around in a blink of an eye. Riches and relationships stay for a long time if you wisely invested your time to acquire them.

Wrapping It Up

Are you feeling too envious of other people lately? Let us talk it out and keep you aligned with your goals without destroying your current relationships. I witnessed coffee chats. Help people realise the benefit of seeing better people in their lives.

Erena Oliver | Relationship Coach